Reflections on Two Centuries of Desperation

Regular readers here will not be surprised to learn that I believe one of the most blatant examples of the preaching of "cheap grace" is the elaborate mythology of Hal Lindsey, John Hagee, Tim LaHaye, and other purveyors of dispensational premillennialism. This grievous hodgepodge of gnosticism, dualism, sensationalism, and escapism has been infecting the evangelical wing of the Christian faith for nearly two centuries. Although apparently in its death throes, it continues to command a large and devoted following because, at its root, it speaks to a deep felt, albeit unredeemed, human need. On the occasion of John Hagee's endorsement of John McCain, Anthony Sacramone reflects on the enduring popularity of "parsing the end times."

For those of you who have not been counting down to Armageddon since that concatenation of false prophecy The Late Great Planet Earth hit bookstores back in 1970, John Hagee’s ministry consists of oversize illustrations of who-is-going-to-invade-Israel before the always imminent Rapture sweeps all true Christians into the clouds with Jesus until the tribulation period, in which the Antichrist pursues some unfortunate economic policies until Christ returns again and establishes his 1,000-year reign on earth until Satan is loosed again to wreak havoc until Christ returns again again and Satan is finally thrown into the lake of fire with his minions and this guy Earl.

Everybody got that? Lots of killing, Rapture, clouds with Jesus (return 1A), Antichrist, Jesus returns (1B), lions and lambs, Satan loosed, Jesus returns (2), The End. (For a more interminably drawn-out version of this scenario, see the Left Behind books, movies, and videogames, which turn the bloodfest that is the end of history into madcap fun for the whole family—and a great Sunday school tool, too!)

The only thing wrong with this parsing of the End Times is that its biblical foundation is based on one or two badly misinterpreted verses of Scripture and a desperate need to hurry divine judgment before an awful reality sets in—sometimes life does not get any better. It bespeaks a now two-centuries-old desperation on the part of some folk who are having a hard time of it and just want out—or at the very least want to be vindicated for their beliefs in the face of so much unbelief. I do not doubt the genuineness of their faith, only the vacuity of some super-preachers’ dividing of the Word.

As N.T. Wright ably demonstrates in his new book, Surprised by Hope, there is work to be done here on the Third Rock from the Sun that is intrinsically linked to the coming Kingdom of God—and not just in terms of evangelism. Oh, and there is only one return of Christ, not two.

In a presidential election year in which we may well have to decide between the lesser of two evils, it is hardly comforting to know that the presumptive Republican nominee now has the endorsement of the man affectionately known as "Dr. Armageddon."